Charley Horse for Your Mouth!

My first book for kids (at least I think it’s for kids), is being launched by Workman Publishing into book and gift stores just about everywhere this week. And I gotta say I’m excited about it. Twimericks is a major step toward sliding my life over more to where the words are. Meanwhile, whether anybody wanted me to or not, I’ve added a new word to the English language: twimerick. What’s a “twimerick”? Ow, my arm -- okay, okay, I’ll tell you! Picture a limerick and a tongue twister in your mouth at the same time, rushing into an out-loud head-on crash at the intersection of Tongue and Teeth -- and you got it.

Writing a really good twimerick is time-consuming and somewhere between difficult and impossible. It’s hard to say why I enjoy putting myself through this. If you’re a crossword addict like me, you kind of know what I mean. But, years ago when I first came up with the idea, I hadn’t thought of a book or illustrating any of them or even what to call them or who I was supposed to be writing them for. I‘d just write one out once in a while for myself. The illustrations have ended up looking a lot different from what I usually do, the result of a few years worth of late night suicidal missions trying this and that. But a book for kids is an excellent reason to make art a different way. An audience that young has probably never seen what I’ve done, has no expectations of me, and is open to absolutely everything. Who could ask for a better one?

The B-I-G idea with the book, though, is to read the twimericks OUT LOUD AND FAST with your friends and not have your teeth fly out the window… or worse. Terrible things can happen to your mouth when you read these, and there’s a Surgeon General’s warning on the first page to remind you about such things. So, if you do try to read any of the twimericks shown here out loud and fast, don’t sue me. You’ve been warned.


One last thought for now, Drawgers: please do not think that I’ve created this book out of any selfish desire toward monetary gain or chance at celebrity of any sort. Above and beyond all else, I have been driven by the noble (dare I say spiritual?) hope that Twimericks serves the most basic of all human needs that is in each and every one of us: the need to laugh hysterically at family members and friends when they make complete and utter idiots of themselves.

Visit The Official Twimericks Website at Twimericks.com!

Twimericks!