Outraged Illustrator is Outraged By Outrageousness!
AUGUST 29, 2006
Seriously!!
The voice on the other end sounded weary, distracted and slightly sinister. "Um, I'm looking for Steve Wacksman"
"You found him-"
"Oh,,,hi. Uh, my name is Lefty Romaine*and I'm calling from Chunks* magazine. We're a new food mag..."
I'll spare you the blow by blow and hack publishing boilerplate about how Chunks* mag is different form any other of the myriad food rags littering the racks. I did my best to sound interested and toyed with injecting a touch of intrigued.
The pitch: "We'd love it if you'd do a piece for our upcoming issue".
Great, I think...here's a chance to get a foot in the door while this baby's still on the ground floor.
Then the zinger:
4 x 5" horizontal.
Full Color
Unproofed manuscript
Sketches: Wed PM
Finish: Fri AM
Fee: $200
I couldn't help myself - " Two hundred?! Is that EARTH dollars?"
Lefty gave me the ol' "We're all in this boat together-we're just getting started- this could be the beginning of a beautiful relationship" rap. I've herad this millions of times- it used to be " this'll be good for your portfolio" or "I'm not gonna be at 'plumbing today' forever - I'm going places and I'll take you with me".
Mister Romaine, I'm sure you had the best intentions and really wanted to work with me and you've been a fan forever, but I've got mouths to feed. Well, I have MY mouth to feed, and your offering of a sock full of dusty nickels is barely gonna accomplish that ( I have a healthy appetite, so what?). So to you ( and those like you who seem to have a real knack for finding me) I say:
Good Day, Sir.
© 2024 Steve Wacksman